This Drifting Excrement Was Way Too Meaningful! It's the TV Letdowns of the Year.

Looking back, we reflect on the television landscape of the recent year, a handful of series emerge not for their excellence, but for their spectacular failures. From awkward sequels to confusingly poor documentaries, here are the programmes that left us utterly bewildered or simply reaching for the remote.

The 'Sex and the City' Sequel

How to start with this love/hate spin-off? Plagued with woeful writing, cringe-inducing arcs (justice for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series struggled to find its footing. For a moment, as the third series started, it seemed as if it had finally hit its stride. Then arrived an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the creator declared this would be the last series. It ended on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was just way too on-the-nose. Still, fans undeniably found joy picking apart every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a small sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Can Kim Kardashian act? The answer is a resounding no.’

But that was practically the least of this show's problems. The recipient of a exceedingly uncommon zero star assessment, it was hard to know where to begin enumerating the flaws. The laughably wooden writing? The tedious veneration of affluence and consumption? The seemingly deliberate procession of cliches? Acting so bad they felt almost malicious? Let’s just say “each and every one” and forget about this series again. Except, a new season has been ordered, so we’re probably going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Given the legal troubles, abuse claims and parental shortcomings, it’s fair to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not that you’d truly have gleaned it from this multi-part docuseries which smirked its way at Sheen’s various episodes of reckless excess while failing to tell us anything we weren't already aware of. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any pity this show might evoke should be reserved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charismatic but flippant egotist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we understood it was ridiculous from the outset: a thriller about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of sheer love for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One scarcely cared when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat.

MobLand

Dodgy figures meeting in deserted boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

Actually, that is unfair on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a little dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the ignominy of having to accommodate unconvincing accents. But there were many other issues. Primarily that it was just profoundly boring; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various cockney rogues which seemed rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the degree to which she grinds the gears of certain performatively angry commentators, it’s temptingly easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into twee homemaking as deliberate provocations. But then you view them and are forced to admit that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware catalogue animated; a meme for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a procession of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, Hallmark sayings and forgettable crafting “hacks” you’ll forget instantly. All supported by vast, mostly undeserved wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously interesting things to be said about both Victoria Beckham and her journey with vocation, identity, self-worth. But for some reason, this three-part series chose not to explore them. Rather, the experience was like consuming a marketing brochure. She clearly has good reason to bridle at what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But unfortunately, she didn’t do herself any favours with this guarded letdown of a series.

The Game Show

It should have been the next cultural phenomenon – except even more extravagant, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a sharp-tongued personality managing her inheritance. What more could you ask for? As players competed, there was plenty of backstabbing and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s even now too complicated to explain what exactly was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via prerecorded videos. The series ended up reeking of a programme that was straining desperately to emulate something far greater than it.

Too Much

How does one succeed a show that defined a generation? The pressure was immense for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who lands in London with a broken heart. The lead actress took her biggest role by the horns and was joyous to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very glossy and, ironically, was insufficient. Plus, the abundance of famous cameos involved felt icky.

The Sketch Show Return

Not even good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the shrewd inclusion of gifted emerging comics, hopes were high. But unhappily, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a single joke stretched to a husk but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a familiar irate mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, meanwhile, simply inspired the idea that they should probably have stayed in there a while longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely showcased the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The material needed to be handled with care. Instead, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lumbering from oddly breezy, slightly mannered farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Complex? Arguably. A complete mess? Very much so.

The Maths Genius Thriller

We love the star … but did we buy him playing the most brilliant maths genius in history, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? Nope! This international thriller about secret services targeting – and killing off – academics honestly got more absurd by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This uncritical portrait followed the content creator renowned for explicit escapades as she prepared for her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we wanted was far greater interrogation of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have interviewed the now-famous mum who appeared to drag her son away from the queue. What we got was disturbing shots and zero interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. And to think, the filmmaker has a young daughter too.